My "scape" to the island

As I mentioned before, I needed to process some documents to be able to enter an institution, so they sponsored my flight and I found myself receiving something more than the documents I was going to process.

I had everything I needed to remember who I am, what I am, how I choose to live, what lifestyle I want to fight for, what kind of environment, environment, forms, I want around me...

I remembered my resilience, the gratitude of those who support me, recognizing my capacity instead of the overprotection that I find somewhat suffocating... The fine distinction in the sensitivity that comes with it.

Going from one place to another by my own means, on my own when doing various bureaucratic processes and finding myself in an environment of harmony, support, kindness in government offices: a jewel among many that the island has.

I managed to obtain every document I needed... A friend helped me expedite the most complicated one.

I didn't go on vacation: I went home...

At all times I received smiles, support and disposition: I did not feel the bureaucracy or the heaviness of dealing with people saturated with annoyance... on the contrary, I fell more in love with my home, with the people who are there working for the good of those who live there. the island...

Reinforcing the love for the majority of the people with whom in my daily life they are generating that imperceptible internal grace that is sown, taking root inside, which is reflected in love and respect for my new land.

I went to where my heart beats with excitement every time I land and becomes pasita when I say see you later... where we have created friendships and I have created an atmosphere of an adult family that is there, close in space, in our hearts, in our eyes. of hello, in the hug, in the moments of everyday life... How I missed them!!

How do I identify with you today? I know that we bring that peace that this place leaves us in the little corners of that inner being of ours, which makes us like a kind of accomplices that connect like the network beneath the earth that nourishes between the trees...

from that calm, warmth that life on the island offers us and that only we feel at every moment since we wake up.

I managed to use my bike!!

After so long, she was able to take me to the sea and then submerge me and feel that hug from the beautiful grandmother Ixchel, charging me with her energy, carrying it in my system for what follows...

Remember Vane, remember... she told me at a calm pace

It seemed that she was talking to me while she took me in her immense arms, showing me her beauty in the tones of the space between the clouds, in the silence, in its depths with gradient blues from the bottom to the top...

Take a breath, Vane... remember that you and I have been connected since that first time when the call was clear when you were four years old... I, Ixchel, island of feminine energy, grandmother of the island, stayed there, kept in you and I have accompanied him since then. Today I am here...I will wait for you, I will continue waiting for you every time you return and manage to come on this one that is just a journey... until one day we are together again in the almost everyday.

I was able to be with Mario, share with him a little more about how much there is to offer from this beautiful space and how beautiful it is to exist in moments of life together...

I was able to have a day-to-day life with the mind of loving her, taking care of her, walking her... playing... that companion who trusts me so much, who took us so much time to create this interaction or dynamic that we experience so naturally today...

We even had pizza and wine gathering with our friends from the park!

Ahh what a beautiful day!!! How beautiful it is to remember that I am a person full of life who simply has a diagnosis that is important to attend to, because I am willing, very on time and remember not to get carried away by those confusions that some friends or acquaintances reflect with their sad looks or crying about my diagnosis, yes, I understand the concern but although I understand that we all in a certain way interpret it with a greater fatalistic tendency instead of it being just a stage to face.

... I blame the movies, the series for their lack of sensitivity in the handling of extreme sentimentalisms whose collective misinformation generates this generalized fatalistic idea, not my friends, because I know: I reacted in a similar way at the beginning and the The information I have obtained has helped me to separate this belief from my system - because in my case, even despite the severity of the location and the type of cell, the great advantage that exists is that it was detected in time, which puts me in a scenario closer to success, in fact: very!-

I was able to leave my apartment ready to temporarily receive my great friend who I hope finds in him the healing refuge that the place has offered me, the plants that inhabit it, the wings that welcome him, that light coming in through the windows, the wind that runs through the hallway... Visits from hummingbirds in windows or that come in to say hello. The beautiful terrace that gives us dreamy sunsets.

Today I said see you later... I will return to you - I hope soon and repeatedly -... without caring so much about the discomfort of the process of possible exhaustion and various effects that I will not know until I start them but me: I will be where my life connects in such a pure way that it has become part of what nourishes my days and I know it is the best therapy...

I know, I lived it to the fullest this week: so, one way or another, I will make it (I know well).

And before a person or a couple jump up and tell me with all their love, to protect me from no, to just hold on and that'll be it later, let me tell you that my doctor supports me and has given me a lot of information that yes, that It's possible... Well, even he said it: "the only thing I don't recommend is resting" when I asked him what exercises he could or couldn't do...

When I mention going to Cozumel - coming and going - he comments that many people do this with longer distances... with chemo, with other even more complex treatments.

Under that recommendation I cling to not stop, to resolve, to continue living, doing, being and adapting... not stopping enriching my life, living is very important!!

... Anyway, here I am making a living living in my style, being a little happy, disruptive, challenging, authentic, with some fears (of course! I won't know what it will be like for my body until everything starts...) but not with panic or denial, without positive or negative extremes: embracing reality with its ups and downs, knowing I am alive.

Today I come to dance again with life at another pace so that later we can have tea with the lady in black with Oz, with her friend of lights and elements called life and the little mortal who has visited the operating room so many times, to have such a talk. enriching that will lead me to know even more unknown versions of myself that may provide other wisdom... or more the chip of... indefinite that is inside hahaha

I also came with the idea that I recharged myself physically, mentally, emotionally, energetically for what is coming, which I define as doing an ultra triathlon on Mars...

Or an ultra-ayahuasca with peyote + toad (it would be the new age version of personal work, right?)... Hahaha

Anyway! So for now today:

I said see you later to my island, to Mint, to Mario, to my family there... I am thankful that I will get home, to my parents... wow I have moved their lives... wow in their own way , they have found themselves facing their resilience, their capacity to love, to be...

Thanks life! I have everything! Yes... Everything!

.. listening to Coldplay, inspiration becomes stronger!!

Hahaha Enjoy your day!

Mua!

Vane